Evaluating listening skills (Revised)
In daily conversations, it gets hard
when the listener does not show active listening skills or the communicator
being unable to read the nonverbal cues given by the listener. To give an
example, I will be using a scenario I observed between two friends named Charles (whom is 26
and Alphonse whom is 20).
(It started with Alphonse
complaining to Charles about his tight schedule for the upcoming semester. Alphonse
complained that his friends from other colleges are having a schedule that is
not as tight as Alphonse. Charles replied that Alphonse should be glad about it
as this implies that the college is thriving for their students to achieve
greater heights. At this moment, Alphonse let out a deep sigh and thought to
himself why Charles could not get the point he was putting across and looked
away from the conversation. Alphonse then started looking at his phone with his
lips protruding while Charles continued talking. Upon noticing Alphonse silence
after a period of time, Charles started questioning whether Alphonse was
actually listening to what he has to say and that led on to an argument.
In the example above, Alphonse displayed
a nonverbal cue of him being disappointed by the reply given by Charles as
shown by Alphonse breathing a deep sigh after Charles reply. The reason was
because Charles did not attempt to read the underlying message from Alphonse
that he wanted to have a fun study life along with his friends. By having a
tight schedule, it would only result in Alphonse not being able to hang out
with his friends. Alphonse being 6 years younger than Charles could still have
the mind-set of wanting to maintain a balanced work life structure where he
could have fun while studying hard for the degree. However, Alphonse being the
younger one and not having enough experience to make sound judgement, started pouting
and not replying to Charles. When Charles questioned Alphonse, he did not
notice that Alphonse is unhappy. This lack of nonverbal cue of not reading a
person’s facial expression led on to the argument.)
Hey there, this example of a scenario was pleasant and has shown a various verbal cues.
ReplyDeleteAs you have said, younger men may not be matured enough to make sound judgments or even understand or even try to sympathise with Charles's feelings and experience of being in College, being so busy until the sacrifice of his free time with Alphonse. However if seen in different perspective, since Alphonse is a just a character, it could be evaluated differently.
You have stated that Alphonse is 6 years younger than Charles. Since this is a scenario, in Singapore context, Alphonse could be in the midst of serving the nation in National Service or still be studying for his diploma. In Social culture, it is known by many that when serving the nation, the only time you are free is on the weekends, and mostly saturdays since half your sunday would be spent on packing your bags heavy for camp and travelling to camp. He could very well be missing out on hanging out with his friend so much that he felt that Charles could have sacrificed a bit of his weekend to see him. However if Alphonse was a Diploma Student then it could be evaluated the same way i have inferred from what you have said.